I Love Email Like This

There's nothing like getting an email like this to give you a smile at the end of the day:

Thank you very much for corresponding for last week. Significant meeting was done last week by your full cooperation.

Please cooperate continuously.

Please receive a good new year.

Hey, I am not laughing at my customer - his Engrish is a hellovalot better than my Japanese, domo arigato.

More Engrish here, which is always good for a chuckle or two.

Let's Party Like It's 4702!

In case you forgot, today is New Year Eve - by the Chinese calendar. Tomorrow is the first day of 4703, so party your socks off tonight. If you have trouble remembering that number on your checks, you can just remember that we are bringing in The Year of the Cock Rooster (so today is the last day of the Year of the Monkey).

So what does a Rooster Year mean? It makes you wish you were staying Monkey:

(The Year of the Rooster) may require a great deal of effort this year to resist going off on wild goose chases. Refrains from making speculative ventures. Disappointments and conflicts will result. The Rooster likes to flaunt his authority and a lot of trouble can come from his domineering attitude. But since he also symbolizes the good administrator and conscientious overseer of justice in the barnyard, the peace will still be kept. Everything will be precariously balanced in the Rooster's year, as his dramatic personality can set off all kinds of petty disputes.

This year we may have to expend maximum effort for minimum gain. Try not to fuss too much. Details do need looking into, but don't forget to view the whole picture. Be cautious. Do not aim too high. One is liable to get shot down.

I think I'll have a couple of extra martinis tonight to bring in this type of year.

Plagarism Doesn't Exist Inside Companies

I got an email forwarded to me today. It was written by my Executive VP, who is outlining a new strategy he is initiating. The orignial email went to the CEO and a few other senior execs. The reasons behind the strategy - about 80% of the email - were cut and pasted from a marketing overview I wrote and sent him recently.

Nowhere in the message am I mentioned. Nothing like "...based on a marketing analysis from the Window Manager..."

Ten years ago I would have been furious. Today...well, I really don't care. Really. Maybe because I am jaded. Maybe because I am more experienced in business and understand how things work:

Email Doesn't Have Footnotes - To be fair, there was probably data in there not only from my marketing analysis, but also from the sales force, other marketing people he talked to, etc. And my analysis wasn't generated in a vacuum - there were people who I could have thanked. There is no opportunity to put this sort of information in footnotes in an email or a put in a "I would like to thank John and Fred and Joanne...." for every single thing sent out.

Your Job Is To Make The Boss Look Good - Your job - any job - is to make your boss look good. In an ideal situation, he in turn takes care of you. If I make him indispensible, he makes me indispensible. And I ride his coat tails all the way up. I haven't worked long enough with this guy to find out if this is the case, but as I noted before, he has brought me into his staff meetings although I am technically one rung too low to be included.

I Am In A Good Place - I work remotely from HQ, from my house or a local sales office if I want to hop into a "real" office. As noted before, I'm happy with this situation and he is welcome to use whatever I send as long as he keeps me in my present situation until I am ready to move. I have no desire to go to HQ or anywhere else just yet.

The one thing that bothers me is that he didn't copy me - or bcc me - on the original message. Someone else on the original list recognized that it pertained to an area I specialize in and sent it my way. An oversight? Maybe. Maybe not...

Advice on a Stalled Career

Another reader writes in for advice, but I think the value in these columns is from readers' input, so add your $0.02 in the comments section.

"Dave" writes in with the following (edited slightly for length):

I have been at a tech startup for almost the past 2 years as the director of marketing. The startup is backed by top tier Sand Hill VCs and in the hottest tech segment right now. I feel it's time to move on for several different reasons: my passion is no longer strong at the company, there's no real carrot here in terms of salary and options, and I need to build up my resume with other successes to enter a top tier MBA program.

I've explored options with several companies where I have gotten a similar pushback--lack of experience and/or track record (these were high level 100k+ jobs where other candidates were late 20's and over 30). Keep in mind that I am in my early 20's and this is my first full time job after college--although I have done several high profile internships. I'd prefer to make a latteral Dir Mktg to another startup, although I might be open to a senior mktg role at key segment in a larger company.

I'm really stuggling on my next step and where I want to take my career. What I do know is that I have a knack for mktg and am an entrepreneur. On the side I am launching a new B2C startup, manage my own real estate rental investments and supplement my income with stock/options trading. On the other hand, I realize that part of the issue is that I may be just a tad too ambitious and just want to win too bad.

There's a lot of info in there, but I will put in my two cents on a few issues that caught my eye:

1. Getting that Carrot - Have you talked to your manager about getting that carrot? While I wouldn't tell him you are considering leaving, I would bring up what you have done for the company, how you feel about your compensation, and your desire to be rewarded along with the company's growth and success. You might be surprised at his response. If you haven't said anything, he may just assume you are happy with your current situation. And getting those options might do wonders for your motivation.
2. Business School - With your background and inclination for entrepreneurship, I am not sure that you really need or would benefit from B-school, except for the possibility of networking. Even then, there are other ways to get the same level of contacts, so I am not sure taking a couple of years off and spending lots of money for a degree is needed in your case. I do believe b-school is helpful for things like finance, accounting and the drier parts of business that are harder to "pick up from experience", so just make sure you are eyeing business school for the right reasons.
3. Putting in the Time - You mention that you are in your 20s and this is your first full time job. And it sounds like you are doing pretty well at it, but just aren't currently excited about it. Unfortunately, a lot of career growth means putting in the months and years at one job. A job isn't always running around 100 mph with your hair on fire, but doing the little things day in and day out, even to the point of drudgery. What this does is your case is get you experience past the point of product introduction and growth, so rounding out your experience in the product life cycle. For large companies looking at resumes, seeing lots of time and experience as a Marketing Director in one company looks better than job hopping between start-ups and an MBA, but this sort of brings me to the next point.
4. Strike Out on Your Own - From what I read, it sounds like the large corporate marketing path isn't right for you - at least not at this stage in your life. You say you are an entrepreneur and have a deep desire for winning, and that just says "start-up" to me, but one where you are pulling the strings instead of being an employee. My biggest recommendation is to go down this path - start your own company where you are in the lead, or with a group of people where you are the top marketing person. I think this would give you the excitement, job satisfaction and sense of accomplishment that you aren't getting in your current start-up position.

Cliches and Catch Phrases

Just Procrastinating Has a Dream: develop a cliche that will be universally adopted.

This is a worthy goal, and similar to a major professional aspiration for advertising executives: creating a massively used "catch phrase". While cliches are truisms that people use for specific cases, catch phrases usually don't designate any deep truth or meaning, and - ideally - relate back to the product. In addition, cliches are generational or regional, while catch phrases usually last a few months, tops (example: "I love you man!")

Besides advertising, catch phrases also come from movies ("I'll be bak"), comedians ("Now, isn't that Special?!)" and TV shows ("Don't have a cow, man!").

The thing is, our culture generates so many catch phrases that there is there is a board game which names the catch phrase, and you name the source.

Based on this I will create my own cliche: Everyone in America will generate a catchphrase once in their life (okay, maybe I am ripping of Warhol's idea a little).